To do:

4681.
The last four digits were 4681.

It's funny how something you've remembered all your life could suddenly disappear in your mind. Then pops back out in the middle of nowhere.

I was playing with my hair, thinking about how I should do something about the quality, then.. how I should improve myself. I weighed. It breaks me. I finally hit a stable 47. Why can't I resist junk food? Why can't I continue workout like I used to? What's with me?

I watched mamy movies. The more I watch, the more I feel empty. Like what's wrong with me?

I think I might still get a distinction. But I might fail too. My stamina's not good enough, but definitely enough to pass this shit. Enough to last till the third piece, English suite. Mr Fung's texting me. He didn't use to be like this. Look how worried he is. I'm sorry.

I need to lose weight.
I need to do something useful.
Tomorrow's the day I finish all the exams I can think of. So tomorrow. After tomorrow, I'm done. Tomorrow I'd reach home sad. I know I'm gonna be sad. I'm gonna fuck up aural, and fuck up the third piece. My hands would shake, I won't play as well as during practices.

But I'd have done my best. I never had my fingertips skin growing out this fast. It's so thick I could pick up hot plates without any burning sensation. I practiced. I stayed up. I have nothing else.

After this, I'm going home, sad. And I'm gonna get back on working out. I'm gonna run and work back on abs. I'll  have to drop to 44 before degree starts. No more midnight snacks. No more anytime snack, unless it's fruits or vege. Come on.

I did this once, I can do it again.

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